Happy Father's Day! ( to the real dads)

As most people know not only am I a mom who adopted but I am also adopted myself! All of my life I have had people ask me the dreaded ''real" question. It started as a child: Is that your real dad? Where are your real parents? As my kids became ours forever and always the questions began again : Are those your real kids? Are they real brothers and sisters? Is that their real dad?
Now I would love to spend a few years minutes talking about people and their completely rude and inappropriate questions, BUT I will save that for another day! This post is short and to the point. I want to take a moment and thank all the REAL dads out there.
The first men in my life either abused me or forgot me, but don't feel too sorry for me because it was not very long until I met my real dad!

 From a very early age I knew my dad was special, I knew he chose not only me but to love my mother,brothers and my sister unconditionally forever and always! He is not always open with his feelings but there has never been a day that I doubted his love and complete devotion to us all! So happy Father's day to my REAL DAD! 

In writing this post I had a lot of time to think about what a real dad really is.. And I have come up with a basic idea.
 A real dad makes many mistakes, But loves enough that he is always forgiven. A real dad is adored or despised ( depending on the age of the children) and knows that both mean he is loved!

A real dad will give up everything just to see their child's smile. A real dad will work 12 hour days just so he knows his little princess has plenty of clothes in her wardrobe, that same real dad will work 12 hour days and  come home to play ball with his boys.

A real dad will play and laugh when the weight of the world seems like it is on his shoulders.

A real dad knows that some times a kick from a raging six year old usually means that six year old really just needs a daddy hug.

 A real is always ready to give a hug or maybe just a lift for a while, he also knows when to just be there for you..

So to all the real dads out there, thank you! Thank you for loving us when we didn't know how to love you, thank you for being the dad you didn't have to be.

UNCLE JAMES

                                                DANIEL BRICE
           BENE BRICE

 Thank you to all the real dad's the blood ones, the heart ones and all the men that simply stepped up when no one else would.



In memory of Roger Seals

Jesus loves them All

I have waited a while to write about this...mainly because I was just so hurt, and because I simply had no words to express my sorrow and anger.


I have always known that race and skin color are still  issues in some places, That eventually my kids will realize they are different than their blue eyed ,blond best friends.

I just never dreamed it would be now!?

It all started when we made a quick stop at our favorite Chikfile, when we sat down I noticed there were five or six little girls all about WJ's age. They were all white but it was a non issue in my mind. Our church and schools are predominately white or Hispanic so our children are almost always the only little ones of color. It has never EVER been an issue! Until now, our kids never even noticed it. If anything they felt a bit superior because guess who never ever gets sunburned! In fact the only thought that I gave the situation at all was to wonder which little girl would come out fussing first.

After about ten minutes of playing in the tunnels out of sight and ear shot . they all had gathered in a little circle with 'W' in the middle. I noticed this and was secretly rejoicing! WJ does not always play well with little girls because she likes to tumble and find bugs as much or more than she likes to play barbies. As I sat watching, it became apparent that this was not a friendly huddle up and share secrets kind of circle. I watched my little Princess's shoulders slump and tears begin to role down her cheeks... I stuck my head in to see what could possibly have hurt her feelings so deeply. As I did my heart sank and the room began to spin!

" you are so ugly!'

"look at your nasty brown skin"

"It's disgusting"

 " I hate it"

were the words being said by a hateful  four year old standing between ''WJ'' and I, Followed by a chorus of "uhhuhs'' by her mindless minions!

 OK so maybe mindless is a little strong but I am still in a state of shock.

 How can four year old children be so filled with hate!?! If I had not been so shocked perhaps I would have asked the mother who stood by smiling like nothing was amiss, or maybe I would have even asked the children why they would think that having darker skin was a bad thing? MAYBE I would have given a little talk on how God made every one and never makes mistakes! But instead I grabbed my little one and just left.........leaving food and trays behind I got in the car and drove in silence for a long time praying for the right words to explain to my daughter that this would not be the last time some one would hate her before they even knew her simply because of her skin.

As I said at the beginning of this post, I know that racial tensions still exist, I know that there will be people that will judge us because of our skin color. I know that people are still dying and killing because of differences, but what I don't know is WHY??

When we brought our children in to our family, there was never a question of skin color. I never had to go to my family and ask if they would accept a black or hispanic child into their family. We all are simply family, all of the littles adore and hate each other depending on the day or the moment. But it does not now and it never will have anything to do with skin color.
So why in other families can hatred run so deep and so rampant that the smallest children can feel it and act on it? And more importantly or at least equally important is how do I teach my sweet innocent children about racial tensions with out making them fearful and jaded? When is the right time to talk with my boys about cases of racial profiling? When do I explain to my princess that some boys might not be allowed to date her because of the way she looks? Obviously most of those questions will be a long time from now.....but it does not stop me from wondering. Or having nightmares when I hear of another death or beating brought on by racial tensions?
For me what keeps me up most nights is simply wondering why? Why when we as a nation have come so far, why do we still hate difference? I have no answer to this question.....What I finally told my sweet girl is that people that hate you before they know you just need Jesus.



JESUS LOVED THE LITTLE CHILDREN, ALL THE CHILDREN OF THE WORLD. RED AND YELLOW BLACK AND WHITE, JESUS LOVED THE LITTLE CHILDREN!